PTSD for New Content? #COVID19
Anyone else find it oddly easier to watch movies or tv you have already seen then new releases or things you haven’t seen since being in isolation? I can’t put a finger on it, but new content is so much harder to digest for me than a rerun.
I can’t tell if it is projection of my own anger that things are not normal for me when I see my favorite you tubers release content on schedule where I am sitting here going… “holy crap, it’s Friday again?!”
Or if I am feeling overwhelmed by the idea of too much free time so I end up doing nothing with my time. No workouts, no TV, no video games. Just kinda nap and or read news or scroll endlessly on social media.
Perhaps it is the idea that my routine is gone. So normally I would wake up, workout, eat, get work done, then decide my entertainment. But now I don’t have a routine. I have a very long endless tunnel of time and it is that no light to the end of this new normal that makes it hard to have a routine.
Maybe an older movie or TV show versus the cool new stuff is easier to just veg out on if I decide I want to refresh my news feed to see what’s happening in New York and New Jersey. To see what hell today is bringing.
I dunno it’s all garbled. The only clarity I got was writing a review for a company that sent me a product recently. It felt nice to get lost in something that felt normal again. But it was short lived.
I worry about releasing new content myself as I wonder if others are unable to digest anything but the headlines of Covid as well. So should I finish my review or wait til there is some normalcy to do it. But honestly when will that be. Sure as hell isn’t anytime soon no matter how optimistic we can be.
It’s funny too, because before all this I worked from home. Nothing changed except I need to plan further ahead now. I can’t just go ; oops I need food or oops I need to do laundry.
Perhaps it has to do with the lack of it feeling like a reward for a long day. Or a procrastination for a hard one.
Maybe I’ll go back and organize this into writing and coherence later. That’s been a good outlet.
Night.
